This is a story about moving on.
If it’s even called a story.
* * *
If you should ever leave me
Though life would still go on, believe me
The world could show nothing to me
So what good would living do me?
God only knows what I’d be without you.
* * *
Actually there’s an amazing list of things that one would be without his or her loved ones around.
Yes, often a person might be so in love that he might begin to wonder, what would happen if that person is not around. What would happen if ever she left? Will I be able to take it? Will I live?
Well, you don’t know, until you decided to live your life…..like normal.
When you decided to move on, pwehaps you’ll find yourself waking up in the morning, clean up, have breakfast, go to work.
You drive, you talk to colleagues, to clients, to your bosses.
You do presentations, you get involved in meetings, planning, excecution.
You have lunch, then continue with the rest of the day, sometimes until the night falls.
You go home, clean up yourself, your kitchen, your life.
Have dinner, watch TV, read.
Maybe you’ll fall asleep.
The cycle goes on and on.
* * *
Which brings me to another song:
“I try to read, I go to work, I’m laughing with my friends, but I can’t start to keep myself from thinking, I wonder how, I wonder why, I wonder where they are? The days we had, the songs we sang together.”
* * *
Yes, life goes on, despite that calm facade that we all put up, some more successfully than others, not many know what lies within.
Not many understand that empty shell inside, that might get bigger and bigger each day, eaten away as time goes by.
Not many realised that one is barely surviving, that shell with no meaning, just trying to live by what seems to be normal.
Without a spirit, without a goal.
* * *
Of course you can move on. We all can, and should do.
It’s a matter of understanding why, and knowing how to. I know it’s such a cliche that “everything happens for a reason”, but it’s always true. Of course, a person crying and wailing for having lost a loved one wouldn’t want to hear that, would not want to accept that. But that state of mind should not last long.
There is time for mourning, but there’s also time to get up on your feet and get going.
It’s always good to have some form of social life and contribute to the lives of others. There are so many people out there who need love, attention and care, or simply listening ears.
There are so many people out there who would appreciate you more than others will ever do. You might think it’s unfair, “I miss him so much and he never thought of me even for a minute of his day,” or “all I wanted from her is friendship and closure but she’s not responding any of my messages.” Well, yes, it’s unfair, and holding on to that might actually be good for you because it is about time for you to look out for people who really care!
Perhaps your parents miss you more than you think. Perhaps you could spend your time trying to make amends with your siblings, perhaps despite the fight you two had all those years ago, your brother is yearning for a close relationship with his siblings. Maybe you should pay a visit to your aunt you have not met for months or even years. Bring your parents for a holiday, or if they are not that kind of people, cook them something special at home.
It is always worth the effort to make amends with family, because trust me, on the deathbed, the most common regret is not treating one’s family well enough.
Even without any family members nearby, there are others who need love. Orphans, the elderly in old folks home, or sometimes just random people. Maybe friends too.
It’s about time to shift the focus from ourselves to others. Focus all of our energy, emotions and thoughts towards the good of people around us. It really does wonders to one’s soul, thinking of others rather than oneself.
The problem about moving on from break ups is, one of them, thinking about how you need love from that person who left, how nice it would be if you’re still together and you’d see his smile or her twinkling eyes as she spoke to you…it ends up being all about you. The key is to focus that energy to someone else rather than yourself.
Easy to say? Yes.
Difficult to do? Of course. Nobody said it’s without a challenge.
But it’s possible. You just need to want it to happen.
And understand why you should move on.